The Need To Retreat

These days I am much better at noticing when I need to take time out and retreat. It can be as short as a few hours in a day, or as long as a few months. I find it’s important for my health and well-being. I can get caught up in life, its stresses and ‘busy-ness’. Sometimes a breather is needed.

It also gives you time to take stock. Are things going the way you want them to go? If not, what changes can you make? What else can you do to improve things? Or, you find out that everything is the way you want it to be and you don’t need to do anything. In the midst of stress, we can’t always see the wood for the trees, so taking time out to retreat gives you clarity and an opportunity to (re-)focus.

I find it particularly necessary to retreat after a trauma, whether it’s a loss of a loved one, an accident you’ve been in, or a period of all-consuming stress. Whatever the trauma was, time and space is needed to heal. Allow yourself to heal. Give yourself the time, space and nurture that you need. Even if there isn’t anyone around you who can help you, you can always give to yourself. Take the responsibility. Don’t rely on others.

For me it is also important that when I do retreat, that I accept I am in a place of rest. That is harder than it sounds. After a few days, especially if I am taking a significant amount of time off, I may become restless. Thoughts and feelings arise: “I should be doing something; I can’t just sit around. Who am I kidding?” etc. At this point I have to remember to be kind to myself. It takes time. My mind goes in overdrive, but over time it does seem to calm down, and starts to accept that it’s fighting a losing battle.

At other times I haven’t rested enough and I have been struck down by a nasty cold or flu. “There you go,” says my body, finally forcing me to listen and take a break. “OK, you win, I will rest and recuperate.” Again, this is not always an easy thing to do. I am not a patient ‘patient’. I get bored of not being able to do much. Then I start to wish I had rested properly before!

When I retreat I ensure I look after myself. I eat healthily, I go for gentle jogs, I do yoga, meditations or relaxations, I read (inspirational) books, I watch (funny) films – anything that helps me to relax and switch off. The one thing that I find most therapeutic is walking in the woods. There is something about being in the woods for me, something special and magical. It’s a place to re-connect with yourself, your spirit, and with what’s around you.

I know when I have retreated enough because I get itchy feet. I am ready to get back into the world. I have more energy, and more to give to others. I am nurtured, nourished and overflowing with love and compassion.

How often do you recognise when you need to retreat? How often do you allow yourself the time and space needed to heal?